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Florida man on MDMA maroons himself on lake fountain to be with swans

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ORLANDO, Fla. – A man who allegedly stole a swan boat and marooned himself on a fountain in the middle of a Florida lake told police he took a large quantity of MDMA and wanted to be with the swans that frequent the lake.

According to an Orlando police report obtained by Orlando Weekly, 36-year-old Kyle Thurston said he wanted to be with the swans because “they don’t judge him.”

At about 4 a.m. Friday, Orlando police came to Lake Eola and found Thurston sitting on the fountain screaming for help.

Police said Thurston forgot to tie up the swan boat and it drifted off while he was on the fountain.

When he returned to where he thought the boat would be and realized it was gone, he sat down on the fountain and started calling for help, police said.

Orlando police are following up with the rental boat company to see if any charges will be filed.